Dear Movies – Please Stop Making Me Cry

I try not to be a big baby and cry at movies. It’s quite embarrassing when it happens. I can pretty much figure out which ones are going to be tearjerkers and I try to prepare myself. Most of the time, however, it doesn’t work.

If it’s in a movie theater, it’s not so bad. It’s dark and people can’t really see you. Also, I have a trick that I use to disguise the sobs. If I have a feeling that the movie is going to induce tears, then I take some kleenex with me (or a concession stand napkin if I forget), and sniffle, dab my eyes, and occasionally do a fake sneeze throughout the movie – BEFORE the sad part happens. Then, when the sad part does come and I do start to tear up, people will say, “Oh, he’s not crying. He has a cold or something. He’s been doing that sniffling throughout the entire movie”.

Sometimes, however, it doesn’t work. I start making those ‘trying to suppress a cry’ noises. You know, like the ones that little kids make after they’ve cried their eyes out and then try to catch their breath afterwards.

The worst and most embarrasing time that it happened was when I went to see Mr. Holland’s Opus. OMG, I was so unprepared!
I sniffled a little during the clarinet scene. But, at the end, when they were having his surprise retirement party for him in the school auditorium, and 30 years worth of past students had come back to premiere the composition that he had been working on THE ENTIRE MOVIE, I kind of lost it.

Mr. Hollands Opus clarinet scene
Mr. Holland’s Opus tearjerker finale

I'm sorry I was such an ungrateful child, mama

The other movie that makes me boo hoo every single time that I see it is Imitation of Life (Lana Turner version). Especially the part with Annie and Sarah Jane in the hotel room.

Get out the kleenex
Imitation of Life – Sarah Jane, the ungrateful child scene

Other movies that make me cry:
Dark Victory with Bette Davis – the part where she goes blind right before she dies.
Searching For Bobby Fischer – ending scene
Madame X – Lana Turner’s death scene – the end
Old Yeller – the rabies scene

I also cry at tv shows. That’s why I won’t watch Undercover Boss or any reality or talk show where they make poor, unfortunate people’s wishes and dreams come true.

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11 thoughts on “Dear Movies – Please Stop Making Me Cry

  1. One movie that to this day tears me up is Charlotte’s Web. My parents used to dread when that was aired on tv because they knew I had to watch it and yet I would end up a sobbing mess. I thought, when I had my own children, that I would protect them from the sadness of the movie and decided to read them the book. It became a nightly ritual, but when I got to the part where Charlotte dies, I has to stop and have a good cry. My children, having no idea why in the world their mother had become so emotional, looked on in amazement. I think a few of them tried to muster a tear or two, thinking that is what one does… lol. Thanks for this post, I haven’t seen all these movies, might be good for a release one night when I need a good cry!

    • I have never seen Charlotte’s Web. I may have to look into that.
      I try not to be in the same room with someone else when I watch these movies.
      Thanks for the comment! 🙂

  2. Funny you mention this, Bob, some buddies of mine were discussing this not two days ago. Also, you misspelled embarrassing in the first paragraph! You forgot the “s”!

    I only ever cried at the end of Gladiator, The Last Samurai, and towards the end of The Return of the King.

  3. The first movie I ever cried at was A Star is Born…the Barbra Streisand version. I was a teen and went with my mom, aunt and one of their friends. I was sniffling, sobbing, coughing…it was horrible. I couldn’t even stop when the movie was over. And those grown ladies teased me relentlessly.

    • My roommate in college had the A Star is Born poster on the wall by his bed. He used to play the album all the time. I got so sick of hearing “Evergreen”. I wanted to scream.

  4. I’m such a crybaby too. Even if I’ve seen the movie several times, I still cry at the same scenes. It’s particularly embarrassing when I’m watching with my children, like when we watched “Up” and “Toy Story 3”.

    • I know. We watched “Up” when I went to visit my brother in St. Louis. I had to go hide in the bathroom a few times so no one could see me when I teared up.

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